Excerpt About Lover

The Friend is the True Mind and the Lover is the True Heart

The friend is the true mind and the lover is the true heart. So when I talk about the lover, I’m actually not restricting it to intimate love relationships. The lover is a part of you. Because of our human situation, we connect intimate love relationships with sex. But the lover is a part of you, just as a friend is a part of you. When I say the lover is drunk, I don’t mean unconscious. The drunkenness of love is not the same thing as the drunkenness of alcohol. I use the word drunk to mean that your usual intellect is not there. But this doesn’t mean that there is no awareness, no clarity, no presence. The lover is really present. When you first fall in love, you know how aware you are. When you’re really a lover, you are very aware of what’s happening. You notice the slightest movements of your beloved, the slightest changes. You are acutely aware of him. Your beloved turns his head and you’re aware of it, and why. He gets hungry and before he says anything you’ve brought food. Before the beloved says, “My back hurts,” you’re massaging his back. You start making plans for a trip to Hawaii and you don’t know why. It turns out your beloved really needs a vacation. The lover is very sensitive and very aware. The drunkenness is not unconsciousness. Your head is completely gone and completely empty. You just see what is there through your heart. Your heart has its own eye which sees and is sensitive. You please your beloved because it pleases you. When your beloved hurts, you hurt; when your beloved is happy, you’re happy. There’s no difference, no separation. You’re sensitive and aware because there are no boundaries.

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